Bath haus of Gaga

I have not written in a long time because I have no internet connection from my apartment and it's weird to blog from the NYU library, which is why I'm keeping this one short. But reading the conversation Paul posted on facebook (Paul is a dickwad, don't worry about him), I was reminded how much I like writing about music. Also, I'm trying to apply for jobs writing about music, so I promise I will write in this, once I get internet, which will be in like December, because fuck Verizon.

This video is only necessary if you're the kind of person who still tries to scare people on Halloween. I'm posting it because, despite how batshit unhot she is, I'd definitely hit it. And also because it's the first new song I've heard since "Party in the USA." Not as good though.

5 Separate Videos set to Shawn Michael's "Sexy Boy"

401(k) Version



Achilles to Youth Version



Gratification Version



Usurper Version



Spongebob Version

Seth Rogen: Dickhead

Never before have I felt more tension between my inability to criticize black people and my hatred of stupid people.

Proto-nerdism

Having learned that the original meme Hamster Dance has been castrated into oblivion by the powers that be and apparently think it was a viable enterprise and not something people visited one time for 45 seconds when they were 8, I was reminded of a flash video I found in 8th grade, when these things were actually sort of an esoteric project. In my mind nothing on the internet since has improved on this video.

John Fogerty

In case you find yourself perusing the tracklist on John Fogerty's new record and get stopped up by track 11, "Haunted House" is in fact about moving into a haunted house. "What's the point?" some will ask, "beyond the affirmation that John seems to be doing well," as if that isn't enough.

I also read that Rudyard Kipling poem with the "You're a better man than I am" ending

Here's what's going on: throw your hands up if you've ever spent all night spinning poorly-received Lou Reed solo albums from the 70s but not really listening so it all sounds fine but not great because Lou really isn't into hooks, either because he doesn't have the knack or he thinks they're beneath him, and oh yeah the lyrics, Poet Reed, even though any halfway honest person will tell you that yeah, he's probably a smart guy but who the fuck would validate this as poetry, and what the fuck is this smart business anyway, as if equating love with time or drugs with dysfunction is really that profound, oh, poor guy's in love and has problems, when I was on the subway last weekend guess what I didn't want, songs that try to prove nihilism by being detached and aesthetically conscious, I wanted songs that sounded alive, like Jackie Wilson, who released Higher and Higher the same year Lou released Heroin, the grand statement of which is that heroin isn't good or bad it's just a thing for people who can't deal with the homeless problem or whatever, which isn't profound as much as it's lazy, so yeah I spun the love song and bounced all over the subway platform which is as far as I can tell a superior consequence of m-u-s-i-c than the smug egotism that comes after validating cynicism and believing that process is somehow beautiful and sincere because it's expressed well (though not as good as getting a boner that rips through your pants, and immediate pleasure being so instantly equated with sex is probably the best thing I can say about Lou Reed because he was sad enough to perceive some general need for ironic distance within consumer culture that would manifest itself casually that way to his super-fans a generation later, but I'm still down with it because I like music way more than I like sex, and while we're on the subject, on good days I feel like making the Geico Cavemen into a tv show is the best form of market subversion we're going to realistically get behind, (especially since that show didn't succeed, because it was bad I hear), not better than ranking the recurring characters from advertisements in order of likeability on your personal blog, but better than avoiding the television altogether), and then at four o'clock realize you've wasted the past 2 hours and can't decide whether to go outside or try to sleep or put on Almost Famous because you're rewatching all your dvds to justify their purchase. Yeah I should probably move.

They've been playing all night so I can't really parse specifics, but he does get off some hot tracks on some of these records. "She's My best Friend" for example, off Coney Island Baby, could do some damage.

A Serious Man

Everybody gonna dance tonight. Everybody gonna feel alright. Everybody gonna dance around tonight.

Party in the USA (For Real)

OH GOD there are so many things to say about this video that I've watched 800 times, so I'll just stick with the two most important ones. First, it's so good how she throws her hands up every single time she says "put my hands up." Second, this party is without question taking place in a Walmart.



This is the Infinite Jest. You will never stop watching.

Party in the USA

Sometimes I have very bad ideas for things to write about. And sometimes when I have nothing to write about except for these bad ideas that're only still in my head so that I can imagine there are critics who talk about the good and the bad of my vast well of inspiration, I write two sentences in my blog about absolutely nothing.

Also Miley Cyrus erased her twitter because she was sick of gossip sites reporting on things she said she was doing on it. She used the phrase "lame gossip sites," which makes me wonder if somewhere there are people who fully support the unlameness of gossip sites, and are offended when people perpetuate this stigma they have.

A Series of Difficulties

An oddly necessary song. Let's see, what could it soundtrack I wonder. What did I do today? Saw an apartment in Spanish Harlem. Yeah, that works well enough.



By the way if I ever at any point claim this album is good its because it overwhelmed me with sheer insanity.